The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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