Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
