Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize