There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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