You really coming over, don't trick.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
