Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
