my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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