ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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