i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
