so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
