they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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