my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
