the day after is always just damage control
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
