Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
my poor anus
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
