Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
