can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Found the puke drawer
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
