its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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