i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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