This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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