Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
