dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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