dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
