I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
