does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
im holly from the hills drunk
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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