Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I am puke
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Randomize
