I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
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