I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
