You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
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