Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
