pedialite and red bull = repair kit
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
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