worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize