I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
