i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
