So drunk its hurt
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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