I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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