can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
