I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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