My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Then you guys just all showered together...?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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