my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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