Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
