I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
