would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Randomize
