bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
