Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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