i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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