This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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