When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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