i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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