Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize