I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
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