this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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